Well, I suppose I better thank 2020. Being made redundant certainly has a lot to answer for. Training in a fast paced department store as a personal stylist, dressing hundreds of women and men to losing your job certainly pulls the rug from under your feet. I'm always grateful for that burning desire that carried me through my last job. The desire to make a personal styling service more personable. "I feel I need to deliver more," I would regularly say. "This could be so much more."
The struggle.
A year prior, I was on maternity leave, fighting with post natal depression and feelings of
restlessness. I had spent months prior dreaming of my own styling business and what would it look like? I would daydream on my rainy walks back to my car, heavily pregnant after working all day, what my brand colours would be, how my services would be personal and how I could go that extra mile? It was on my mind constantly and it didn't go away after the birth of son. That's when I knew I had to start my own business. I started designing the website and opened my services. What a buzz!
Oh and then I got made redundant, my financial safety blanket had disappeared which made it all the more scary. I was offered to retrain in something. The invitation felt exhausting at first. I've got a masters, I've started my own business and now I can retrain? In what??
"Kate, you are really good with people, I'm not sure you realise how good," my mum said to me over the phone whislt I was scrolling aimlessly at courses at the local college.
"Mum I don't want to be at a college! I didn't like it the first time round," ( That's another story.)
Mum always being the most resilient woman I know was persevering. " Well look somewhere else! You need a plan B. Do something you're already good at. You would make a great counsellor."
So I did and I found the most perfect counselling centre, 5 minutes away from home, nestled away, with horses overlooking the classrooms. Before you know it a month later I was starting my journey training to be a counsellor.
In four months time, ( providing I pass my exam) I will be a qualified counsellor with a diploma in therapeutic counselling. What?!
I never thought I'd love something as much as styling and I think this is what initially put me off the idea of looking. "Nothing will measure up to that feeling of how you make people feel." Turns out, after having my own clients for the last year of my training, being a counsellor matches this!
And then something changed...
I began to look at my business differently. I looked beyond the clothes. I started to get a deeper connection with my clients and as a result more client referrals were being made and more bookings were coming in. I stopped trying to sell myself so much and the services and why I was the right stylist for the job and instead I slowed down. I listened to my clients hang ups , I laughed with them when they would tell me just how much they hated shopping. I had more compassion and empathy which as a result made clients feel more relaxed and comfortable in my presence. People liked how relatable I was and how I took the pressure off a service they thought would be 'intimidating.'
The human connection.
I was always aware there was a certain stereotype that followed with being a personal stylist. Films based around this role show stylists as impatient, demanding, critical and bitchy. The narrative was so exhausting for me to watch. As if we didn't have our own hangups.
"I was so worried you would tell me to throw my whole wardrobe out."
"This wasn't a scary experience at all. I need to shop this way from now on."
This is something I hear with almost every experience I have with a client. No I don't counsel my clients before you ask but I do know that people are multi layered and complex, so building that relationship with my client is so important. If they don' t trust you, you will fight a losing battle styling. For me this job has never been about me, how many followers the brand has, the latest item I bought or what I prefer to wear, it's about the person who has enquired, who has trusted me into their home and who feels comfortable for me to style them in a way that works for THEM.
It truly is an honour and the best job in the world
Kate x
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